What Sayeth Da' GOAT?

GOAT faithful,

I want to first apologize, I have been out of the loop with no internet signal while I’m staying in “God’s Country”. Hell, I don’t even have a phone signal! But anyway, I do want to update the crew on what’s been going on with the GOAT and give a shout out to “THE GREEN MACHINE” with a great effort on Saturday! 1-1 NEVER looked so good! I’m calling you 2-0 until further notice!

Last week was a BLOOD BATH, as the GOAT got destroyed…I couldn’t catch a break! I’ve put out an APB for “MY SHIRT”….and the “Washington Huskies” defense! Poor bastards cost me a backdoor cover, personally I think the “fix” was in, I mean, how do you hold a team to FG’s all day. Then with 2 minutes left you let IDAHO…F**KING I-DA-HO put together an 8 play 97 yard drive, scoring a TD with :07 seconds left to cover by .5?!?!?! FIXED I TELL YOU!!!! I’m still bitter….


Last week was a grease fire for several Teams, here’s Da GOAT’s TOP 5:

1. Okie St.
Mike “FUZZY” Grundy, you suck…and so does your defense…I hope you lose out…”You’re a man…you’re 40”…and should be ranked that in the country…Bunch of bumbling idiots..

2. Notre Dame
The Golden “I give” Domers made a liar out of “Drunk Uncle Lou”….again. “Touchdown Jesus”…HELL....how about “DEFENSE……JESUS?!!?!?” MEEECHIGAN is NOT GOOD…So I guess you’re worse than NOT GOOD…you’re HORRIBLE. Charlie Weiss, your “PANTS ARE ON FIRE” my friend…go ahead and change the name plate on the door to read “Brian Kelly”. I guess that “Interim” sign was the truth.

3. Tennessee
Lane you’re a f**cking “DOUCHE CANOE”, and I want to personally welcome you to the SWAMP… and GOAT faithful to….LAY THE POINTS. I guess you have never seen an UNDER ARMOUR commercial, because you damn sure didn’t practice the slogan “WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUSE”…Hell you got your head kicked in for 60 minutes in YOUR HOUSE by UCLA, the bottom feeder of the PAC-10, and it’s only going to get worse this week. I predict a 56-0 nothing ballgame, because you suck, and so does your team.

4. FSU
Dad Gum! Took every bit of those 60 minutes to dispatch JACKSONVILLE ST.?!?!? We’re horrible, we weren’t looking ahead, we ARE that bad. The Morman’s are going to beat us up like their 13 wives on hump day…glad I don’t get the channel the games going to be on…Jimbo + Bowden + Dad Gum = THIS IS GONNA GET UGLY.

5. THE University of Higher Education located in Columbus, OH
Da GOAT doesn’t give a rats ass that you “Played a good game” or that “you lost in the end”, you still lost, and you will forever suck. You cannot beat anyone with a heart beat outside of the Big 10. Face it, your garbage, plain and simple. Don’t blame Jim Tressel for playing conservative football. Blame Jim Tressel for not recruiting any talent. “The herd” said it best when he said “they simply get beat by better teams with better players”. You are now 0-forever against the PAC-10 and SEC. Not to mention, you let a freshman come into the “shoe” and lead a game winning, “Tom Brady style” drive to beat you. Good grief ya’ll are horrible. Of course the media still thinks that you should be ranked…I DON’T. Ya’ll are no better than Akron or Toledo, because you can beat up most in your conference, but the minute you step out against the BIG BOYS, you get “SKULL F**KED” all over the field. Dissolve the athletic program now, before it gets worse! Tressel, trade the vest for a plane ticket out of Columbus….


Da GOAT’s “Prime Time” players of the week:

1. Matt Barkley
2. Case Kellum
3. Tate Forcier
4. UCLA
5. Tim Tebow
6. Joe McKnight
7. Tiger Woods!

Da GOAT has put an APB out for: My Shirt, Alabama’s Defense, ND’s BCS bowl bid, Ohio St.’s talent, Okie St.’s defense, Washington’s cover, Tim Tebow’s girlfriend, Bobby Bowden’s retirement consultant.

Also:


I will be breaking down the N. Texas/Bama game tomorrow as promised, but “Open Mic” has been suspended for this week due to lack of internet service, so thank T-MOBILE. I cannot properly analysis the games, because I have no access to information. I will get some looks tomorrow or Friday during the day, so we should be prepared for the weekend! Feel free to ask for opinions on games, just not big write up’s this week ONLY. “Open Mic” will return next week!

As far as the MIAMI/G-TECH game tomorrow night, Da GOAT is leaning toward Miami at the moment. Miami showed us a lot against FSU, and have had 10 days to prepare for G-TECH, who tried to give their game away against Clemson. . G-TECH looked good in the first half against Clemson, but they’re offense was not the reason. They actually only scored 10 pts. In the first half, the rest coming off of Special Teams plays. Nesbit was a “Mess” every time he threw the ball, mostly because his “twards” was a little…well, WAY off…He could sand if he fell of a camel last week. Try that against Miami, and you will get HOUSED…

Now, I cannot ignore that “ROAD DOGS” are now 2-0 ATS with Clemson and South Carolina both covering on the road on Thursday Night. I will be looking at this game tomorrow and giving my play tomorrow evening after further analysis.



Enjoy,
Da GOAT